Some Dad Issue!

Another one from one of my favorite sites:

10 Things Girls Who Have Lost Their Dads Want You To Know

 by Kayla Hays

When I was 17 I lost my dad unexpectedly. It’s been seven years and the pain is still very real. Over the course of those years I have come to realize many things that I feel need to be shared with others. I know there are many other young women who are in my shoes. To our friends, these are the things we want you to know.

1. We’re sorry.

We are sorry for being quiet every time you talk about your dad to us. We don’t mean to sound uninterested or make you feel that your happiness is unimportant to us. It’s just that when you talk about moments with your dad, it takes us back to moments with ours. Moments we wish we could relive and share with you, too. We don’t get quiet on purpose; it kind of just happens. It’s our mind’s way of protecting us from bursting out in tears.

2. Ask about our dad.

We want to share him with the world and when you ask about him, it fills our heart with so much joy to know that someone is actually interested in knowing him like we did. You’ll just have to excuse us as we talk through the tears.

3. Please don’t try to understand our heartache.

We appreciate the effort, we really do. But the truth is, unless you’ve lost a parent, you truly can’t understand.

4. Listen.

That’s the best thing you can do for us. When we have a bad day and need to talk to someone, be that someone. You don’t even have to say much, just reassure us every once in a while that you are still hearing us.

5. Please, please, please don’t take your dad for granted.

We love you and we don’t want you to feel our pain someday. Please don’t just assume he will be there for you to call tomorrow. Call him today. Right now. Don’t wait until it’s too late and then spend their rest of your life hating yourself for it.

6. Make memories.

Don’t have time? Bullshit. Make time. You always have time for the ones you love. It’s there; it just has to be utilized.

7. ALWAYS tell him you love him.

I don’t care if you two just got in a screaming fight and you feel in that moment you hate him. You don’t. I promise in a few hours you’ll realize how ridiculous it was to even think of the H word. Before you walk out that door or hang up that phone, say it.

8. Forgive us. We are broken.

Sometimes that shows a little more than usual. When our dad’s left this earth, they took pieces of our heart and soul with them. On occasion those pieces feel as though they are slowly being glued back together. But then there are the times when they feel like they are being ripped apart in shreds. This may bring out a side of us we aren’t used to. If there are times when we may not seem like our normal selves, please understand we are grieving immensely. Losing someone of such importance changes a person. We are being molded into a new place in our lives. It’s a slow process and a fragile one. Please, forgive us.

9. We are here for you, too.

When that unfortunate day comes about when you lose one of your parents, we are here. Day or night. Rain or shine. Just call us and we’ll be there. We know all too well the pain you are enduring and we will do everything in our power to comfort you.

10. We are jealous of you.

I’m willing to admit it, and I’m sure others are, too. We are so jealous that you still have your dad in your life that we have to put the brakes on the eye rolls that are ferociously trying to take over. We don’t mean to feel this way. It seems so selfish, and in a way, it is. You have to understand, we are experiencing feelings we’ve never felt before and trying to find ways to cope.
Deep down, we are happy for you. It’s just every time we read a text or a Facebook post about how your dad made you laugh, or how he is going to walk you down the aisle at your wedding, it’s like another slap in our face. Now please understand, we don’t want you to stop sharing these beautiful moments just to appease us. In fact, we need the opposite. By you sharing moments with your dad, you are helping us come to terms with the loss of ours.
We will eventually get used to it and the feelings won’t be so evil. We will finally realize that just because we lost our dad and we are filled with sadness, doesn’t mean everyone else should be, too. The jealousy will always be there. But instead of the eye rolls, there will be a smile. A smile meant for you from our hearts. A smile that says we are thankful you aren’t experiencing our pain and you still get to make memories with the first man to have your heart.

To Great Mornings!

Most of us probably dread monday mornings and maybe even just the thought of it on Sunday night. Count me in. Can anyone please invent an alarm clock that rings and then drags you to the bathroom for a cold shower? Yeah! I need that!

Anyways, it is a normal Monday morning for me. Struggled to get my butt off the bed as usual. I checked my Safari if I have unread tabs, because I usually just open links and then leave it there for when I have time to read them. So, this  article about "10 Things A Woman Must Have Realized at 25" was on point. I could take a screenshot of every one of them but I decided to take the last one alone because I could only nod my head many times while reading it. Not that the others were not nod-worthy. But this one made my Monday morning a little more bearable.

Good morniiiiinggg!!!

Peace and Love! 😊❤️✌🏻️





credits: alyseestheworld.com

Back to School!

Thursday Thoughts:

Hush...Hush!

In the End, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends. 

- Martin Luther King, Jr.

Under all speech that is good for anything there lies a silence that is better. Silence is deep as Eternity; speech is shallow as Time.

- Thomas Carlyle, Sir Walter Scott (1838).

The saying is true "The empty vessel makes the greatest sound." 

- William Shakespeare,

It is a man's own mind, not his enemy or foe, that lures him to evil ways.

- Buddha

But then again, John F. Kennedy said, 

"Forgive your enemies, but never forget their names."

So, here I am, going back to learning the basics of our Philippine laws. Thank you to lawyer and soon-to-be-lawyer friends for the pro bono legal advice. Hihihi!

It is important to remember that any of the imputations covered by Article 353 is defamatory and, under the general rule laid down in Article 354, every defamatory imputation is presumed to be malicious, even if it be true; if no good intention and justifiable motive for making it is shown. There is malice when the author of the imputation is prompted by personal ill-will or spite and speaks not in response to duty but merely to injure the reputation of the person who claims to have been defamed. 

----------------

Thus, the elements of libel are: (a) imputation of a discreditable act or condition to another; (b) publication of the imputation; (c) identity of the person defamed; and, (d) existence of malice. [Editor's Note: Gathered evidences of these elements. Check, check, check and check.]

Be careful with what you post or write in social media. It can be used as a concrete evidence. But if you can afford charges and can endure imprisonment, then go ahead! Here's to responsible journalism and responsible use of freedom of speech. Cheers!

Next up: Anti-cyber bullying act, Anti-voyerism and Anti-Stalking Acts. Read up!!!

 If you know the enemy and know yourself you need not fear the results of a hundred battles.

- Sun Tzu

Sources: abogadomo.com

Owl!

I saw in my birth certificate that I was born at exactly 10:19PM. That should probably be the reason why I feel so alive during night time. It is when my ideas come in. Right now, I want to write a bunch of things so I'm going to need my notepads again. The traditional pen and paper please, nothing virtual. Let me arrange my thoughts first, then let me get back to you.

Mwah!

Good night Sunday! Gimme some love Monday!

Just Because...

Dress to impress yourself! I am a girl and I loooove dressing up! For no particular reason. Just because...

Work it with accessories.

Shades of Blue + Animal-printed shoes

Prints and prints.

Day and night.

Pastel love.

Polka, Mustard and Lennon.

Peace and Love!

xoxo

Read Up!

Rainy day + bed and pillows + a cup of hot choco + books = ♥♚ my perfect kind of day.

I won't consider myself a wide-reader like my dad. Just a reader. A person who loves some great reads. I choose what I read. Except maybe for those times when I was still a kid where my mom filled our shelves with Encyclopedia and those "1000 Things You Should Know About..." books. I got to the point of rummaging our bodega for books that are interesting. That is where I found dad's Prose and Poetry book, Little Women, Gulliver's Travel that I never got to finish, Swiss Family Robinson, collection of short stories and other old stuff. Why did I ever delight in seeing yellowish, old hard-bound books, ripped covers, and torn pages? Perhaps, like wine. As the adage goes: "the older, the better".

There were times though that I disregard that love for reading. I get lazy or uninspired. I settle for short articles, picture-filled thin books. But if I get the chance, I try to catch on my readings. When I am in my reading mood, nothing can take me away from it. Not even sleep - considering the sleepyhead that I am. I get so excited to finish the book that I tend to forget the time. More than once, I have reached the wee hours, up to 4:00AM.

My cousin sent me new copies for my iBooks so I did a lot of catching up. 

Some of the books I received. :)

                                     

I don't remember everything that I have read so I bookmark or screenshot or scribble down my favorite parts. Let me share with you some of it.

This one is from "One Hundred" by Nina Garcia. It is a fashion book but you can actually grasp more than what it primarily offers.

From Mitch Albom's "Have A Little Faith" :

• "When a baby comes into the world, its hands are clenched...Because a baby, not knowing any better, wants to grab everything...But when an old person dies, he does so with his hands open...he has learned the lesson...We can take nothing with us."
• "A committed person was someone to be admired. He was loyal and steady. Now a commitment is something you avoid. You don't want to tie yourself down. It's the same with faith by the way."
• "They expect perfection. Every moment should be bliss. That's TV or movies. But that is not the human experience."

It is full of lessons in life and love that I just wanted to bookmark everything.

Sun Tzu's "Art of War"

I noted and bookmarked a lot from this book but I will only share one since the others are for a warrior to keep. Mwahaha! Ponder on this one:

"He who wishes to fight must first count the cost."

"The Fault in Our Stars" by John Green

This one gave me an emotional ride. I was angered, confused, anxious, inspired, amazed and humbled. I cried more than once. It is about a girl with cancer who fell in love with someone who is also a cancer patient. But it goes beyond that. Aaaahhh...I can't even explain. It is just beautiful.

• “I believe the universe wants to be noticed. I think the universe is improbably biased toward the consciousness, that it rewards intelligence in part because the universe enjoys its elegance being observed. And who am I, living in the middle of history, to tell the universe that it-or my observation of it-is temporary?” 
• “That's the thing about pain...It demands to be felt."
• “The world is not a wish-granting factory.” 

After those heavy ones, I'll share one that is light. From "One Fifth Avenue" by Candace Bushnell. This one is much like Sex and the City and other Candace books -  straightforward, inclined to women, almost unfiltered, sexy and set in the "concrete jungle where dreams are made of".

“Retribution is tricky. . . . The insult isn't usually worth the risk of punishment. And eventually one learns that karma has a surprising way of taking care of these situations. All you have to do is sit back and watch.” 

Another one from John Green which I'm currently reading. "Looking for Alaska"
I'll leave you with this last one. This made me melt. I wanted so bad to be in her shoes in these particular lines. Don't you?

"...I was gawky and she was gorgeous and I was hopelessly boring and she was endlessly fascinating. So I walked back to my room and collapsed on the bottom bunk, thinking that if people were rain, I was drizzle and she was hurricane.” 

These are the only ones that I have found for now. I adore John Grisham but I don't have a single quote from him. Oh no! I still have to search for some of my handwritten notes. 

I love how books take you to different places. One day you're daydreaming with a character or setting, next day you are faced with your fears - where you want to close your eyes but you have to keep reading. Some days you feel mighty, strong and powerful but some days you are slapped with reality. No matter what, it inspires, entertains and gives me a different kind of happiness. :)

Fist-bump to everybody else who loves reading.  :)

...read!

Excerpts from one of my favorite/bookmarked websites:

"She will not always tell you how she feels out loud. And even if she does, trust to the fact that she’s rolled it around in her brain (and possibly her journal) for quite some time before she comes out with it. Her words are her tools, her armor. She’s best with them when she can shift and spin them on the page. In her throat, sometimes they get caught and fall out all at once—or worse—slide back down and vanish until they flow through her fingers into her next story...

But perhaps most importantly of all, if you love a girl who writes, read."

While reading the article, a silent voice in my head kept saying "True! True! True!" in almost every sentence. I was gushing and you could say I got kilig for some reason I can't even explain. Could it be because relating to the subject means I am a legit writer? Hahaha! A girl can dream, right? I would want to share the whole article with you but I can't. I have sworn secrecy. Chos! Let it be one of those few things that I choose not to share.

Peace and Love!

Good night Tuesday!